so basically

im so fuckin sick of ppl getting on my ass for not being able to see them. talk to me like i don't wake up every morning and see my full calendar. I KNOW IM BUSY im the one that has to do all this damn work. im not bitching about the work im bitching about the people who bitch AT ME about the work i do. i like what i do going to school, kdchi, my job. well i actually hate my job but i love making money so it's all the same thing. but shit i'd rather be busy than sitting on my ass not doing anything being an unproductive nothing in society. with my involvement i feel i contribute and my efforts affect and matter. i could spend my fridays and saturday night partying and yes that is so wonderful but if i've had a long week, i wanna fucking sleep. im just sooooooo done with people trying to tell me what i should be doing with my days. or constantly reminding me how im not around anymore. guess what? SHIT CHANGES PEOPLE CHANGE I CHANGE SO SUCK IT UP OR CHUCK DEUCES. my sisters, i put them above a lot and i put my organization high on my priority list because I WANT TO. no one made me, my decision. I made a commitment and it's something that i may not always like but in the end it's what i love. an obsessive compulsive life i might live but shiiiett, the fuck you doin with your life? it's been building up for awhile and i just realized it now. i know i don't have the opportunity to see those id like all the time but i do my best. i can only spread myself so thin. i don't need to explain my plans or schedule to anyone. i seriously feel like im about to explode and chew out the next person who says 'aw H youre never around, i never see you when are u gonna make time for me, lets do this lets do that when are you free i dont understand youre always to busy its friday lets go out you don't have to do school fuck sleep, youre not really tired' hey guess what..........I KNOW THIS, MANN. you don't need to tell me where i haven't been cause ive been the one informing you that i wont be there. im not giving ppl excuses on why i don't go out anymore im just simply too tired to do so. like ya'll have no idea how bad some people try to make me feel for not being around its fucking retarded. like don't try to make me feel bad because on this school organization and work shit. respect the hustle, no??? i complain a lot about not having a life but when it all boils down to it im very happy and content with what im doing, just extremely tired and exhausted but aye it comes with the territory and im cool with that at the end of the day. im making the best out of my college experience the way i want to. so screw all of you who think it should be done a different way. straight the fuck up. so nearest and dearest friends i love you and im not around but if youre true youll be there when things clear up plain and simple, xmas break is only around the corner. all others who wanna bitch moan and groan move the fuck out the way and stop talking to me.



i do apologize for this outburst im just fed up. on the other hand, it's my blog so i can say whatever the fuck i want

HMA + MAH

my other half is leaving me thursday
never thought we'd part
i.love.you
forever

ive never been to south carolina.
hmm